The Woman Jesus Loved (That No One Else Did)

There’s a curious line in the well-loved story of the Samaritan woman.

It appears in parentheses, so maybe that’s why you didn’t really think much about it.

But you should.

John is telling us how Jesus and this immoral woman meet at Jacob’s well at high noon.

He asks her for a drink of water and then John tells us:

(His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)

So that’s why Jesus is asking her for a drink and not them.

They’ve got the rope and the leather pouch for gathering up water, but they’re all on an errand so Jesus asks her for the drink.

Is anyone else wondering why all twelve of them had to go?

Sounds a little odd to me.

It begs the question: How many men does it take to go to the grocery store and get some lunch?

Apparently twelve.

I’d like to propose a reason Jesus sends every last one of them away.

He wants to minister to this woman He loves unhindered by their prejudice toward people like her.

As most of you know, Jews and Samaritans were in the midst of a 500–year–long nasty feud.

Samaritans were the “half-breeds” who had intermarried with Assyrians and then turned Judaism into something that resembled the occult.

Orthodox Jewish people regarded them as unclean and defiling; Samaritans regarded Jews as hateful, judgmental, and self-righteous.

And that’s why none of the guys are anywhere near the well that day.

Here’s my prooftext: Luke 9:54-44

So later on in Jesus’ ministry, they needed to pass through Samaria to get to Jerusalem.

But some snarky Samaritans blocked their passage.

Since you guys can’t stand us—Go around!

Cross over the Jordan, journey south, then cross back over again to get to Jerusalem.

Here’s how two of the disciples (who are now at the market) responded:

“Lord, do you want us to call fire down from heaven and burn them up?” (And Jesus turned and rebuked them.) Luke 9:54-55

Oh my goodness.

I can only imagine what Jesus said to them. They really were missing the whole point of His mission.

No, don’t call down fire, how about calling down some compassion for lost souls!  And while you’re at it, you can ask the Father for forgiveness for hating people He wants to save.

So, yeah, He sends the twelve liabilities away so He could love on a woman they didn’t love.

We can understand the disciples’ struggle: it’s hard to show mercy to people who don’t deserve it.

But isn’t that the textbook definition of what mercy is?

And it’s also the unpopular call of God upon the lives of all who follow Jesus.

There’s nothing easy about loving unlovely people, but there are some things that can help.

1. Consider the mercy you have received. 

It doesn’t seem right to get to enjoy a lifetime of forgiveness from God after all the ways we’ve wronged Him; and then, withhold it from someone who has wronged us (in less significant ways than we have wronged God).

We forgive from the place of our own forgiveness.

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).

2. Consider their brokenness and need.

Most of the time when people wound us, it’s more about them and their need than it is about us.

When I came to Christ, I realized I had to forgive my father and find a way to show him love and acceptance.

A Christian counselor asked me how my dad was raised.

I told him that my immigrant grandparents were cold, distant, and disconnected from him. This understanding helped me not to take his behavior personally and to have some sympathy for him instead.

The therapist taught me the principle called acting your way into feeling.

If we’re able to override our natural inclination to reject and punish, and act in warm and kind ways instead, warmer emotions would follow.

He was right.

I started sending cards on birthdays, I started asking to talk to him when my mom called me, and when we were leaving family gatherings, I initiated the hug.

It worked—I found my heart softer and our relationship healed.

3. Finally, consider who God is making us to be.

When we believed in Christ, the Holy Spirit gave us new birth, and we are in every sense “children of God.”

And as His children we must bear the resemblance of our Father who is “kind to the wicked and ungrateful.”

That’s who He is and that’s how He rolls—and it’s how we roll, too!

Here’s a passage that has rescued me time and again from spiritual shipwreck:

Do not repay anyone evil for evil… If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.  Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

On the contrary:

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:17-21)

These words are like chemotherapy for the afflicted soul—these commands make you woozy, but they kill all the bad cells!

I hear the Lord saying through the Apostle Paul:

Listen, my beloved child—I know it’s hard and painful.

But leave this thing to Me—let go and trust Me.

I will work out the details; I will bring healing and the strength you need.

In the meantime, let’s soften your heart and I’ll help you to show some mercy to someone who doesn’t deserve any.

And as a result, my goodness, my power, and my blessing will be over your life.

And over their life, too.